Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Joke: The Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

"That's nice", she thinks, "but I want more." So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Sizzling items on tables in Kluang

You have to give credit where it’s due.

The food court operators at a hawker centre in Kluang must be commented for their business acumen. Sensing that their food business was dwindling, they came up with a new plan to bring in the customers.

Nope, they did not sizzle up their menus. They had an altogether different sort of house speciality - girls, with revealing dresses, dancing away sexily on table tops!

According to a NST report today, the emergence of these sexy dancers have doubled the business at the food court.

What you get is this - a songstress wearing a black bra and short pants is shown singing and dancing in front of a group of men. She will then climb on top of a table and starts shaking her head and body, attracting men to join her.

The show is free, held from 10pm to midnight every Tuesday and Thursday.

However not everyone was impressed. NST quoted an angry elderly woman who said she was embarrassed seeing the performance when she went for a makan recently with her husband and two school-going children.
"It was all right in the beginning as the performers only sang. I started to
feel uneasy when they came to the tables and started flirting with some of the
male customers. My jaw dropped when they climbed onto the tables and started dancing," she said.
However the good days look set to be over now. The police raided the hawker centre last Thursday and arrested a female performer!

The food court operators will have to look at other means now to attract customers. Don’t bet against them in coming up with some other sizzling items for the tables.

p/s pix is from NST

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Monday, April 16, 2007

Don’t feed this croc

This Nile crocodile in a Taiwan zoo has found fame for all the wrong reasons - it bit of the hand of a vet last week.

The vet is doing okay now after surgeons reattached his severed arm.

Is this what you get when you relocate wild animals from the original habitats?

Nile crocodiles are known to be man-eaters, but are also listed as an endangered species.

BBC reported that this arm-chewing crocodile was also doing well after it was shot after biting the vet.

It has found fame as a result of the incident, attracting many visitors to its enclosure.

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Sunday, April 15, 2007

Another win in store for BN?

  • Tanjung Karang MIC division secretary and education officer K Parthiban
  • MIC CWC member and lawyer S Murugesan
  • MIC CWC member and social worker T Mohan
  • Shah Alam city councillor S Murugavellu

Until yesterday the second name on the list was the popular choice to be MIC’s candidate for the Ijok by-election on April 28.

Today, it is the name on the top of the list.

The real candidate will be known tomorrow though.

Keadilan’s choice is former corporate figure Khalid Ibrahim.

So we have a Malay versus Indian fight in a Malay-majority seat. The late Sivalingam had won the seat for three years but with a reduced majority in 2004.

Keadilan would think it stands a good chance as a result of that 2004 result and the voter makeover.

BN, on the other hand, had won all four by-elections since the general election.

We have a good fight in hand in Ijok. My early odds are with BN to retain the seat, perhaps with a reduced majority.

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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

The exhibition venue

This is where the Ganesha exhibition will take place this weekend. The temple is Sri Selva Vinayaka. It is located at Lot 5967, Jalan Tepi Sungai, 41100 Klang.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Ganesha comes to Klang

Treat this as a personal invitation please.
















Learn more about Broken Tusk Gallery from their website.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Dreamin' of another CL final...

PSV Eindhoven 0 Liverpool 3
(Champions League Quarter-finals, first leg)
The second leg takes place in Anfield next week. Liverpool looks certain to move into the semis. The picture above shows Steven Gerrard powering in the first goal. This was followed by a thunderstrike by Riise and another top-notch header by Crouch. Gerrard’s goal also meant that he is now Liverpool’s most prolific goalscorer in Europe with 15 goals, one ahead of the legend Rush.
Who’s next? Chelsea or Valencia - a mouth-watering tie. Need I say more?

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Monday, April 02, 2007

Henry calls Crouch ‘the greatest’

After witnessing his side's defeat at the hands of Liverpool, Arsenal's Thierry Henry had an amazing statement for the press; "Peter Crouch is the greatest striker I've ever seen."

Henry, who glides with the grace of a gazelle, has described Crouch, who lopes with the lankiness of a llama, as "A thing of stunning beauty".

According to Henry, Crouch's hat-trick against his Arsenal side was something to be admired alongside the first budding rose of spring.

"It left me breathless." said Arsene Wenger. "I believe I actually lost consciousness at one stage from breathlessness. I only wish my side knew how to put a ball in the back of the net like Peter Crouch."

Crouch, who scores consistently for club and country, constantly finds his place in teams taken by under performing hacks. Currently he is not part of the England team which features Wayne Rooney, who hasn't scored since 2005.

WARNING:
The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

original source.

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